Darla Messenger:  

abused child, (back when people got away with it) I was so self critical due to forces beyond my control, that nothing I could say seemed like the right thing. I was so busy trying to find someone to love me that I never took the time to learn to love myself. I wont elaborate further on this dismal state of affairs, I will only say to parents: Your child's self esteem may someday be the only thing they have going for them. If you don't value them, they may never learn to value themselves. Oh AND: Have a sense of humor! Goodness knows that a sense of humor is critical to success at anything in life. If you have a sense of humor, you can fail enough times to succeed. Secondly: There were really things I would have rather been doing than getting dished out a load of what someone else's idea of what might someday make me a successful person. That is to say: If they would have had classes on things that interested me ( Like paranormal studies for instance ) I would have been an exemplary student. I had a lot on my mind due to my home life that made me need to escape rather than be tied to the mundane chores of school. It is not that I could not have been a great student, just that I wasn't. I was in gifted classes but just could not bear the boredom. I took my GED when I was 16 and passed it with 98% accuracy. I am still bothered by what question (s)I missed because after all, I am a perfectionist of sorts. There are things that I missed that maybe I would have liked to experience along with the reason I may not have actually liked it. LOL School Dances and specifically "The Prom" Well, the idea is good, I like dressing up. I am a romantic at heart but boys have a different idea of "romance" than girls. LOL I don't like to dance in public, it just never felt natural. Slow dancing is better but seems too intimate for public places. I love concerts but I have never liked trying to yell over loud music. TBC Workplace I work from home in my pajamas. I like pajamas. I even like the word pajamas...I think this must be a word of latin origin meaning: "There are things that I maybe should be doing, but really I don't have to." To pull off wearing pajamas all day and look good doing it, you have to put your hair up and add a little makeup and you MUST paint your nails. It's just proper pajama etiquette. I am not lazy, just my work ethic is: Work when you are inspired. My inspiration allows me to make big amounts at a once so I can play/relax/ponder the miracle of Life the rest of the time. I wish this for everyone. We own 2 on line furniture web sites/store/warehouse etc. Which do require hours of daily maintanance etc etc every day but I am able to do these things around my children which makes me lucky! How did we all become part of a machine? It's the illusion that you would not be provided for if you stopped. I believe we all have a craft that inspires us and if you put your energy into that craft, you can be happy forever. I am not a schedule person, there are some days I have to view a calender to figure out what day it is. I am not very conscious of time, other than the fact that I would like to slow it down and keep my children young forever. That is not to say that I don't value my time, because I do and I don't sell it to others cheaply. More to say, I try to live in the moment every day and my time is spent actually being rather than existing. If you have a busy mind, which I do...you can do something brilliant while you are inspired...but after the lovin' is gone...you are bored and have to take a break. But Oh...I do finish what I start....even if it means doing it for hours on end and sometimes even days until it's completion. No, I am not a manic depressive LOL....I never get lows, just that feeling like I have exhausted the possibilities for the current project and it's time to move on to something less mundane. Let's just call it art. lol You can't create art without a muse. Once I am bored, I supplement with things that are more exciting, like chocolate and music. It's self medication at it's finest.